Your Prime, Keystone, and Drain
The last two articles had you define the Ultimate Vision for your life and then discover how you use your Triad when you are both using your success formula as well as struggling or failing. Were you able to see how you use your Triad differently in these instances? If yes, great and if not go back and revisit last week’s homework.
This article will go further into knowing your exact formula for success by recognizing your Prime, Keystone and Drain sides of the Triad. This will set the stage for putting it into action and making 2012 the best year of your life.
The Prime side of your triad is the side that you naturally default to without thinking. This is the side of the Triad that we spend the most time in. It is important to understand which side of your triad is the prime because it can be used in both a constructive and destructive manner (good to know).
So, the first exercise is to take out a piece of paper and answer the question, “Life is….?” Spend about 5 minutes just letting your thoughts flow out onto the paper. When you are finished, take a look at what you wrote. Did you write mostly about structures (rules, frameworks, beliefs, physical things)? Did you write mostly about behaviours (actions, achieving, loving, expressing, etc)? Or, did you write about perceptions (love, peace, feelings, etc.)?
The answer to this question will give you your Prime side of the Triad. Sometimes what you write will be mixed between two sides. If so, look more closely at what you wrote near the end of the exercise. This is likely the more accurate side.
The Keystone side of the Triad is the central source of energy and stability. It is the side of the Triad we are using when really making progress in the Triad. It can be used to link the Prime and Drain in a way that can liberate new energy and resources.
To determine the Keystone side of the Triad, we need to know what comes to us in an easy and effortless way – both coming from ourselves and others. If you enjoy following other people’s rules and also find it easy to follow your own rules, perhaps structure is your keystone? If you easily take action and are inspired by the actions of others, perhaps your Keystone is behaviour? If you can easily change your thoughts and moods and can effortlessly be in the presence of others in less than resourceful states, perhaps it is perception.
Which side of you Triad do you believe is your Keystone?
The Drain is the least effective mode of the Triad and is the side that must engage last when successfully making progress. The way to determine the drain is by asking yourself what you obsess over in both yourself and others. Someone with a perception drain (yours truly) obsesses over their own thoughts and feeling as well as those of others. A person with a behaviour drain obsesses over what they must do and are driven mad by other’s actions. A structure drain obsesses over their own rules and other people breaking them.
Which side of the Triad is your Drain. Sometimes the best way to determine your obsessions is recognizing what drives you crazy (in a negative way) about your significant other.
To give you my own personal example, my Prime is structure. I naturally see things as structures. Even my experiences are stored as snapshots taken in frozen time. Behaviours are seen within the structure of rules and concepts. My strength is my own structures and rules and I am paralyzed by being stuck in another person’s rules or if someone breaks my rules.
My keystone is behaviour. I take action easily and don’t get caught up in what other people do. I am also inspired when others take positive action.
My drain is perception. I obsess over my own thoughts and am easily caught up in my own head. I also obsess over what other people think, what they think about me and whether or not they agree with my own perceptions.
Your homework for this week is to have a draft of your Triad of Progress from the perspective of your Prime, Keystone, and Drain. Next article we start to make things happen!
To see Dr. Epstein himself speak about The Triad of Change click HERE
Don’t forget, I will be presenting this topic live at Gault Family Chiropractic on Tues. Jan. 24th and Wed. Jan. 25th. Both are filling fast, so reserve a seat now.